Setbacks – How to overcome it in 3 simple steps?

Rescheduled Post – Originally posted on April 24th, 2018.

Midnight strikes, and that’s when all good ideas are generated, right? That’s what it is for me, so gonna stop fighting it. My brain refuses to stop. So, blog it is!

Recently, I have been thinking about setbacks. The picture I chose for this post, Sunrise or Sunset? I leave it up you to decide…Pick one for now, will get back to it later. How do people deal with setbacks? Isn’t it so easy to just shove it under the carpet and pretend like it never happened? It sometimes is. BUT.. it depends on what you want the outcome to be right? I see two choices: a) Do you want to accept the setback and consider it your fate? If yes, Ok. No judgement here. OR b) face your setback, understand it and somehow turn it around for the better? 99% of the time, I chose option b. It is exhausting and comforting at the same time.

I recently faced a setback. Without delving too deep into what it was here, I would like you to focus on the process. I like to keep things simple. The setback was surprising (not in a good way) and frustrating. I felt defeated and I wanted to just scream out the words.. “that’s just not FAIR!”, which I did to the ears of my poor husband who listened and I felt comforted. The world isn’t going to be always fair, and the sooner we accept that, better it is for us. Brings me to the first step.

1. LET IT OUT: Let it all out. All the things that are frustrating you. Write a journal or find your faithful friend or a partner who will help you and listen to you. Sometimes people just need someone to listen to them and feel understood. Once you get your release, you will feel better and move on to the next step.

2. ROOT-CAUSE: What now? Two words, Root-cause. Put your realistic and logical hat on! Is it on? – yes? Alright then! Now, think about what caused the setback – What was it? How did it happen? and Why? This is important. Keep asking Why? I’m not sure if you have heard of the 5Whys. It is an actual engineering problem solving method to get to the root-cause of any issue. Really, keep asking why 5 times and write it on a piece of paper. Done? Good! You’ve got your root-cause. Move on to the last step.

3. PLAN OF ACTION: Now that you have got your root-cause, you are more equipped to come up with a solution. Once you figure out root-cause of your issue, you will know what the next steps are. Write some of those steps down. List them out in detailed simple sentences and put a time-frame on it. And you have got yourself a plan. Now, execute it and prove it to yourself, you have got this! Actually, tell yourself that, it helps! Then go Make It Happen!

My dear readers, see how good it feels? You started with this setback which you were trying to deal with. First, you let the setback-venting out of your system and got your release. Now that your mind is clear, you figured out the root-cause, and then you devised a plan for action. That is powerful! You took the situation, turned it around and are working towards a solution in 3 simple — I didn’t say easy;) –steps!

But, don’t you feel better about it now?:) You are in charge of working through your own setbacks!

How do you deal with your setbacks? What do you do? Would love to engage with you in some meaningful blog-versations in the comment below.

Stay Curious & Have a peaceful day!!

PS: The picture was of a Sunset in beautiful Santa Monica Pier in California!:) Sometimes people see the same image and perceive it differently.

51 thoughts on “Setbacks – How to overcome it in 3 simple steps?

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      1. I do a few different things. Praying is a big one, writing, and just taking a few minutes to breath and reflect on the situation as a whole, to see what can be done differently. Staying positive is very difficult sometimes but very rewarding. 😊

        Liked by 2 people

  1. I think so too! Thank you Nancy!:) I had a couple of work trips so wasn’t able to commit to posting more often. But back now. I also nominated you for the three day, three quotes challenge!:)


    1. Thank you Sareena! I am happy to hear you loved it. I updated the post since you were interested in finding out if it was sunrise your sunset. πŸ™‚
      Will definitely check out your blog soon! πŸ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

  2. These steps are probably exactly what I would do. I like how logical you are and even though you express your frustrations, you don’t brood over it for too long.

    Of course it’s a sunset. Because you analyze how your day went, and as the sun goes down, your troubles should be put behind the horizon for a fresh start the next day.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you! I appreciate your thoughtful response. Yes, I tend to be very logical with things and also, I don’t see the point of brooding over things for too long (maybe sometimes ;), when I can spend my energy trying to make things better.

      Better yet, when I learn from my mistakes, I like to write a post which lets me process my thoughts in an organized useful way to my fellow readers/bloggers!:)

      Liked by 2 people

    2. Hi! I like the sentence: …as then sun goes down, your troubles should be put behind the horizon. I would love to act this way. Unfortunately, I have a bad tendency to overthink things before I go to sleep. Any ideas how I can get rid of this habit?

      Liked by 2 people

      1. First of all, things should be dealt with before you end up in bed. Bed is for sleeping, not for worrying.
        Secondly, I make a plan for how I can solve things. That eases my mind, and pumps me up for the next day. However, if it’s something I cannot change/ fix, I ask myself why it really gets to me. This can be a difficult and lengthy process, but the answers can be very illuminating and freeing. Let it go.

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Great read. I have had set backs in my life. Amidst those set backs what I always did was that I did stick to basics. I trusted my fundamentals and let the tough situation take the charge. I knew that after these monstrous sea waves there would be a calm ocean where I can recover myself. 2016 screwed me all over but 2017 was my year and so is 2018.

    Thank you for this post

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you & you are welcome!

      I like the part you said about surrendering to the tough situations and letting it take charge and trusting yourself that you will get through it. Like the thought process behind it. I had a miserable 2012-2014 mostly because I had moved to a place with really crappy weather. I surrendered myself to it, accepted that it was what it was, then I was able to see things clearly!:)

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I do agree with your ways of turning our setbacks into a method to correct our mistakes, but the very first step which might sound a bit easier is actually tricky one.
    How are we going to vent out the frustration and on whom if we want to? Do we have that person who can understand us?
    Having the support system, at that moment is very important. Friends or maybe life partner can play an important role.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for sharing your views on this:) I follow what you are saying, however, I didn’t necessarily mean correcting our mistakes, but more like a process to get through our hurdles and challenges and turn them into wins.

      I agree with the support system part completely. The first step requires someone you can trust that will be a compassionate and patient listener and those are usually close friends, family or a life partner. Sometimes, I even write it out if there is no one around me that I can vent to.


  5. Thanks Β Β  for accepting and following my blog.

    I’m available to read your post at my convenient time.

    You have such an interesting topic I will love to read in
    your blog.

    I still remain Β the simple blogger…..

    Peace ✌and Love ❀

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Your beautiful words just made my day. Thank you so much for adding such magical drop of words in my jar of motivation.I feel blessed by your writing right now.
    I found delight love in what you just said in your post.
    Again such a beautiful write up on your blog.
    Keep the vibes on.

    Peace ✌and Love ❀

    Liked by 2 people

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